Pakistan - Arab Today
Social media has allowed strangers to ‘connect’ instantly, whether it’s through a follow or like. Message boards become home to online cliques where members discuss their interests. For many users, they never get to meet the person behind the username. Does this mean these online-only friendships are not ‘real’? Are offline friendships more valuable than online ones? Or is the internet allowing people to create meaningful communities? Readers debate.
Community
People can bond over shared interests online
The internet and social media has entered our lives in a glimpse, and they have created a whole new world for us. Online shopping, online banking and online friendships are all new forms of the cyber world that we are living in. Is it a bad thing? Risky? Dangerous? Maybe or maybe not. On social media, people have been able to create a new form of identity, an online identity. I think people don’t like the concept of the ‘cyber world’ yet they know they cannot live without it.
I have online friends on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram. We share pictures and we chat, but they do not replace my real friends. I may offer them support, advice or a casual “hi”. I enjoy it because I live away from my home country. Thus, I created my own imagined community online where I share my interests with people I’ve never met. For example, I can have discussions with people I don’t know about books and articles that I’ve read. It is like a book club, but it is online.
I think the online world is good for people who have agoraphobia, social anxiety and fear of being in public. If people suffer from social anxiety and can enjoy themselves in an online world behind a screen, then why not?
Differences
Virtual friendships don’t last
We all have a handful of friends on social media, who we neither know nor have met — and this is no surprise because the Internet gives us the opportunity to expand our network across the globe, instead of limiting it to only those we know in person.
However, based on a few of my personal experiences, I would say that virtual friends are less likely to last longer since the bonding is not as strong and trustworthy as the offline ones. I also believe that the level of emotional attachment involved in real life friendship makes them more valuable than virtual friendship.
For me, there is a kind of resistance and uneasiness when opening up to a friend whom I have met online regardless of how long he/she might have been in my friend’s list. The comfort with real friends is definitely not possible with virtual ones.
However, there are people for whom online friendship seems to blossom into relationship and a happy ending, like in case of my brother. He met his better half online and the first time they met was to shop for their wedding. For someone like me, there were always doubts about such relations, but they just might work at times.
I agree that virtual friendships are not completely invalid, but they are absolutely no match to the offline friendships. The probability of people regretting their decisions, being involved in a wrong relationship or trouble, being victimised or taken for granted is much higher when compared to the real life friendships.
Also, friendships develop on trust. This one factor is usually missing when it comes to virtual bonding. It generally becomes difficult to put trust in someone whom we have barely or not known or never met in real life.
From Ms Fatima Suhail
Student based in Sharjah
Inadequate
Online friendships lack reliability
The ongoing development of digital technology is transforming our ways of communication. Different social media platforms are flourishing rapidly to the extent of becoming an integral part of the generation. This allowed individuals across the globe to form friendships with persons of common interests and to exchange information. However, online friendships lack true qualities of friendship like emotional support, reliability and interdependence since the communication is confined to a computer or an unknown person on the other end.
Although it is possible to get a large number of friends or followers with lesser effort and short time, it’s not suitable to understand and express emotions. Most of these social media users have hundreds and thousands of friends, whereas in reality it is difficult to maintain the bond of a reliable friendship with a large number of individuals, unless we redefine the meaning of” friendship” in the context of digital age. Apart from these, those engaged in online friendships could be tricked by criminals and are vulnerable to invasion of privacy, as somebody may approach the targeted person with false identities.
Online friendship is dormant. However, sustainability of such a kind of relationship is dependent upon availability of internet connection or interest of either of the parties on each end. In contrast, offline friendships have soul and you can see, hear, touch your friend to express and nurture friendship. Physical and face-to-face communication intensifies understanding, interdependence or reliability of friendships, and they are tested with the passage of time.
Social media has made it possible to exchange information and to form unlimited networks, but it cannot replace the qualities of offline communication in strengthening emotional bonds. To conclude, combining the two helps to retain reliable friendship regardless of the place they live and the time.
From Ms Hayat Abdu
Public relations officer based in Abu Dhabi
Caution
Online friendships are not for everyone, and can cause emotional distress
In today’s world, the internet has emerged as the key to communication and vast information access. I grew up as the internet was emerging, and there were various communication tools, like messaging services, available at that time. People were happy to make friends online without knowing them in real life. After a little while, Facebook and MySpace came into existence, and I made many friends online. At the time, they seemed very real to me. As time progressed, my online friends started to vanish. They only chatted because they had nothing else to do when they were free. As soon as they started working, they left the online world as if they were never there in the first place. In other words, people used online platform for entertainment purposes only, or why they feel down and need someone to comfort them.
On some level, an emotional connection plays a vital role in online friendships. If you can’t connect with someone through some emotional element, you can’t move forward. At the same, however, those emotions takes a back seat when they disappear. In my opinion, online friendships can add more stress and the feeling of being unwanted, and it can lead to many psychological problems.
Additionally, online friendships can be very dangerous, because you never know who is on the other side. While the issue of trust is vital in any relationship, whether online or offline, virtual relationships require you to give an enormous amount of trust, consequently furthering your commitment to the person. While the emotions in online relationships takes a long time to develop, once it’s there, it can be much stronger than an embodied relationship. Especially since so much time has been invested in building it. However, once the trust is violated, the relationship may endure ups and downs, but in the end, it has very little chance of surviving. This also affects people’s wellbeing.
Overall, online relationships are not meant for everyone. It is advised to stay away from such relationships because they can be very harmful for mental health.
source : gulfnews